Love,lust,life!

When your love lets you go, you only want love more even when love,
was not what you were looking for.

When you look me in the eyes- jonas brothers

If the heart is always searching,
Can you ever find a home?
I've been looking for that someone,
I'll never make it on my own.
Dreams can't take the place of loving you,
There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

How long will I be waiting,
To be with you again
Gonna tell you that I love you,
In the best way that I can.
I can't take a day without you here,
You're the light that makes my darkness disappear.

Like totally awesome!

I hate it when someone told me to stop smoking and gets really mad when i told him that i smoke, but believe me, he's the one ended up smoking later. Pfft! And eventually, i got no mood to blog when my laptop is finally back to normal. Haiyoh! But dont worry my dearest Amir, im gonna be fine like i always do. N yeah, today i will be spending my night time doing lit grp work at syaf's house. I hope i wont be a different person there. Superman maner kau!! SAVE ME!!!(Obviously, not hazim eh.) Goodbye loves!

I miss Amir, but he misses me more.
Speak slow, tell me love, where do we go?
I know....im being so sgt the cute!! :D

-SOS-!

I dont know whats with me nowadays. Sakinah and jessie commented about my uncheerfulness in school. Even i cant explain it myself. I think im in stress state. Hmm, that could be 1 point. Parents have been putting too much pressure on me not because of my studies but because of my youngest bro pooor education. Daddy said this to me," I dont know how you gonna do it but you have to teach and push up your brother's grades no matter what". I have no choice but to say okay though i have my own studies to consider.
YA ALLAH, PLEASE, ringankan la beban ini. Mudah-mudahan adikku lulus dalam peperiksaannya. Mudah-mudahan aku berjaya melalui olvls dengan senang hati dan mendapat kelulusan yang cemerlang. AMIN!!

But why am i feeling soo empty?? I need my guardian angel bcoz i dont think i can handle this alone. I need a hug, i need love, i need affection. Theres nothing else i would wish for but to have you by my side. I need you. I need you. I need you. I love you but i fear i might lose you. I love you. I hate you. I love you. I hate you. I love you. Is there a moment in ur life where you would sit down and ask urself "he love you, he love me not" over and over again?? Crazy enuf?? Yes, i think i am. Ohhh....fuck!! Okay...im done :D
Tc loves!

(My Guardian angel)

When I see your smile
tears roll down my face
I can't replace.

And now that I'm strong I have figured out
how this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul,
and I know ill find deep inside me, I can be the one.

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all,
even if saving you sends me to heaven.

It's ok. it's ok. it's ok.
Seasons are changing and waves are crashing
and stars are falling all for us
days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one.

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever.
I'll be there for you through it all,
even if saving you sends me to heaven.

Cause you're my
you're my
my true love
my whole heart
please don't throw that away.

Cause I'm here, for you
please don't walk away and
please tell me you'll stay, stay...

Use me as you will
pull my strings just for a thrill
and I know ill be okay
though my skies are turning gray.

(Picture unavailable)

Happy 17th birthday to harveen and jeena!!

I always ppreciate your presence but most of all, thanx for being a friend and a sister.

Thanx for asking whether my day is good, thanx for asking how am i feeling...thanx for concerning, thanx for everything.

For now, i wish both of you best luck for everything. Score well for olvls.

I know you too can do it. Strive for it girlfriends!

Friends forever :D

-An attempt to take a picture with messy hair, no make-up,

wearing home clothes and most of all, sick of Amaths face-

Seriously, Amaths is frustating. Sometimes, i get migrain after doing amaths but alhamdulilah within that 1hr, i could get most qn right. Aku mendak uh buat Amaths kat umah. Hurhur. At least, differentiation is quite okay to handle. It's just the indices and square roots that makes me go olala. I still need to work on my proving for trigonometric functions even though i get the formula right. Yeah, I need to work on it babeh!

And guess wat, more homeworks are piling up since holidays is drawing near. Not only homeworks, test too. There is geography test on moan-day, Amaths test on chp 10&11 on tears-day and english test on wet-nesday. So yeah. Sec 5 life , 1 word -> STRESS.

Come on la, i havent even start my revision. I just thought of filling up my time during the holidays going lib and study with my beloved aku sayang and miss banget sister, Amira. But i guess, that counts if im free to do so. Yadda Yadda Yadda :D

And today, i dont know how and i dont why a english guy got my email add and chat with me in msn, and assumed that i chat with him b4. Now, hes asking whether i have a min or two for us to meet up and have a date or something. Haiyoyo. And how stupid of me to ask him : By any chance do you like asian girls compared to ur own skin?? Im not being bias la. Im curious. I meant, theres a huge different being asian and europeans. Why wouldnt a euro guy find someone his own skin, who most of us asians look up to and treat them as role models or foreigners. Okay. This topic is killing my time. I should stop here.

&& Not to forget,

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO THE CHINESE!!

&

HAPPY HOLIDAYS FOR THE NON-CHINESE!!

Goodbye loves!

-Picture taken aft hockey practise-

Wow. Valentine's day coming. Shoots. Yay! This year fadz celebrate as a single babe uh. Hurhur. I dont know why im so excited, maybe its a first time qn. So far, so good. Singlehood is not bad at all...mcm faham uh fadz. I know, i know. After i said this phrase, 1 week after fadz dah attach. AHAHAHAHAHA. I didnt realised it but hisham made me realised it. OMGAY!

Sham: Tak rasa aku that time ko maki2 aft break up dengan izz. Abeh kutuk relationship merepek la, sakitkan hati la, a yadda yadda yadda rock my panties shit ahh.. Abeh now, kau dah attach dgn ardy. Ape pasal sak tu?

Me: (*Grins and smirk*) Perli aku nampak... Entahlah...aku pun tak tau uh asal...

Sham: Aku tau! Ko dengar clumsy by fergie tak? Ada phrase dia uh (turn on his mp3 and activate it to loudspeaker) "A girl like me don't stay single for long 'Cuz everytime a boyfriend and I break up, my world is crushed and I'm all alone. The love bug crawls right back up and bites me..."

Me: Pantat! Merepek uh kau...dah dah cukup. Suke buli aku eh kau.

Today half of my time was spent on comp, and half of it on homeworks and movies.

Okay bye loves! I should sleep early nnt amir-kene-sampok marah and then we will quarrel like cats and dogs. Heee :D

My saturday was spent well with my buddies and cuzins at limbang until this bitch approached me. I told you not to disturb me again and stop thinking that me and ashraf are together again. I said it many times that 'ITS FUCKING OVER' and why are you being so pessimist about it. Do i look cheap to go around and ask my exs to be my guy back again?! Stopitsiak!! I had enuf of ashraf problems and yeah, guys. Moreover, its not me who is chasing him, its ur bf la bodoh! Mata sortz kaper girl? Haiyo. You older than me lagi sey...Let me emphasize this (esp to ash bcoz i know you will eventually type my blog add and read tis), move on okay and go talk to ur very nice gf to stop making my life close to miserable. Enough is enough. I make a lot of sins in both single life and relationship life. Aku nak enjoy and start a good start. Ada faham? Ahaha.

To 'insert ur name here' : Aku masih contact dgn 'insert ur name here' nye kwn, abeh asal? Dorang kawan aku per. Bukannya aku close dengan dorang aku ada contact dengan 'insert ur name here'. Kalau kau takot sangat, go stay with 'insert ur name here' 24hours luh. I will stay away from both of you. Jangan takut, aku tak akan makan org. Aku bukan carnivorous :D

Sorry for the obscenities. Have a great day loves! (:

Okay, lets just summarise about school. Its pretty boring. Sch were mainly test test test and test. But im happy with my unexpected results. I scored 10/10 for geo though i didnt study for it bcoz i had a fight with ardy the day b4.
I scored 10/13 for ss SEQ and 14/18 for SBQ. I cant remember studying for this too but alhamdulilah! :D
Last friday, i had chem and physics test together. I only studied for chemistry bcoz i couldnt remember anything about alkenes and alkanes. Meanwhile, i just read thru for physics.
I hope i ace it. Insya-allah.

Okay, now im back with many stories in store :D


Let just talk about the sentosa trip which was in the early january i think. Eventually i had fun there. Take a long bus trip from cck ,188 to vivo and then to sentosa. We went to pahlawan beach instead of siloso beach. Initially, i didnt plan to go for a swim but bcoz nana was sadly the only one excited of swimming, all of us go change to accompany her. Amalina didnt brought any extra clothings so yeah, she ended up wearing only tube and her 'baby doll' panties though me and nana advise the more good way and still, she insist of wearing the way she wants it to be.

Basically, theres more funny stuffs but I dont feel like typing it all down. Haha. We headed vivo and ate and lepak. Sakinah FINALLY have the courage to msg and call hafiz and it turned out to be great. We leave vivo at 11 without riyan and lina bcoz both of them left us aft we had our dinner. So yeah, at MRT dramatic pulak. The cabin we board tend to be the unlucky ones bcoz theres a man who vomitted there a few hours later. Then razor start his sarcasm

Razor : Okay, aku bau nana, nana bau aku. Alip ko bau fadz, fadz bau mat. Mat ko bau...apek
sebelah kau.
Nana: Abeh sakinah?
Alip & Razor: Confirm dia tk tau pape...
Me: Bau macam bau buah sey...
Alip: Ahah, bau buah...
Razor: Bau busuk ada uh..Yg bau buah tu fadz la alip. AHAHAHAHA.

-Sentosa pictures-

I adore the love sandcastle :D && ignore the sign. Ty!

We had the best years of our lives,
But you and I would never be the same,
September took me by surprise,
And I was left to watch the seasons change.

It's been so quiet since you're gone,
And everyday feels more like a year,
Sometimes I wish I could move on,
The memories would all just disappear.

So many things I should've,
Said when I had the chance,
So many times we took it all for granted.

I'd never thought this could ever end,
I'd never thought I'd lose my bestfriend,
Everything is different now,
Can we stop the world from turning?

I'd never thought I'd have to let you go,
I'd Never thought I'd ever feel this low,
I Wish I could go back,
And we'd stop the world from turning.

Looking back on better days,
When we were young, we thought we knew so much.
And now it seems so far away,
I'm wondering If I was good enough.

So many things I should've,
Said when I had the chance,
So many times we took it all for granted.

This time, this post is only meant for amir. Thank you amir for being there for me. Everyone knows you have been there for me excluding eddy, who is busy with his new sch environment and hisham, who was so filled with excitement when he got 29points for his olvls. Even though i throw trantrums like a 5 year old child to you, screamed, shouted and disgusted you, you were still there. I cant express how thankful i am but thank you! You can call me and say sorry after reading this and after being mad at me for online-ing in msn for hours. Its not that i do not want to offline but its just that im bored and the random stuffs i would do is to surf. So dont get frust with it but i still dont understand why.

& i can still remember amir said this to me which is the sweetest thing a guy would do to a girl. "A friend is one who knows you and loves you just the same". For once, amir said something sentimental and for once, a phrase that really gets into my head. I cant say much but i do appreciate ur presence. & I really hope we have less fights nowadays bcoz i hate fighting as much as i hate wars and politics.

Will post very soon. And sorry for the dead blog. Heheh.