High sch nvr ends

This current song makes me looove high schoool even more & how much i can laugh my ass off thinking abt the memories in high sch. Credits to the stupid gossip that was created by clumsy yet sweeet people in class during lower sec. Wah Wah Wah sekarang dah besar panjang, tahu malu jugak ey. KAKAKAKA!

The gossip about syaf and "the guy from Iraq" is still fresh in my brain. Thats the first, then booom more gossip! Cool or wat? Then came me, Hazim, wan & khai? (I still take this as a joke though, mind you) Abeh rais, ayam and lina la. Sakinah and wan ey? Eli & k.a? Kk, i shld stop. Dont ask me y im talking about this. Blame the song or maybe blame ridz, syaf and lina for reminding me of this.

Was walking back to class & we met the bunch of guys: (Sumpah they were smirking at us, act cute ey?)

Lina: Haz dgn saper ey yg suker fadz dulu?
Syaf: Wan kn? Wan ey?
(Im not too sure abt the topic but this is what i heard)
Fadz: Woit, aku dgr name aku, ape ni?
Syaf: Takda, kalau after graduation? we meet up again gossip2 masih ....?
=_= NEVERMIND, i forgot :(

In class:

Wan: Aper tgok2? (Show irritating face)
Fadz: Eyyy, saper sak tgok kau * wide smile*
(Sumpah i was turning back to look at pH ppr & Wan was staring at me. SO saper tgok saper ni skarang?) A-L-A-M-A-K!

But watever it is, this stupid gossip is F-U-N! Ahahahaha! Okay, i swear im in a very good mood now cuz hes calling tonight! Wooooots! (I sound so vain ey) But wtf, i dont give a damn. Yok Yok Yok, kiter berdansa! Have a great day lovvves! :DD

Quote of the day: "I need to know that it's possible that two people can stay happy together forever"

I hate how much i love you

The clock just stroke midnight and here i am in front of the lappy, yet again. Fcuk! I cant get thru msn, dont ask me y cuz idky. Haishhh, and now im waiting for his msg or better, a call but i know somehow it will not happen or maybe it will only come by at late midnight. But well, i dont wish to get emotional here. Anyhoo, A VERY BEST OF LUCK FOR THOSE YOU TAKING O's & N's ORAL THIS WEEK! ESP TO MY YOU-KNOW-WHO!

Aliff says that i have the capability of expressing gooood and touching love story in my blog. That sometimes, he could feel the pain too. *Wah Wah Wah! Sungguh mengagumkan utk seorang lelaki yang nampak kuat diwajah tetapi disebaliknya mempunyai ciri ciri seorang lelaki yang berjiwa. Waddduh! Sungguh terperanjat skali, faints.* HAHAHA!

So here, another one to be commented and mind you, it speaks the truth. It comes from the bottom of my heart. Ohhh i wish he wld say this to me....awwww!
- I love you. Not maybe, not tomorrow, not someday. Right now, at this very moment, I've realized something. I need you, I trust you, I admire you. I want you. And you can be wrong most of the time, and we can fight and be mad at each other, but nothing, nothing in this world... can change the fact that I love you. Yet still, god knows how strong my love for you is and nothing else can beat that :DD

Well, it time for me to sleeeep! Theres sch tmr! Goodnight loves!

Quote of the day: "It's not up to me anymore. If you want me in your life, you'll find a way to put me there".

OhOh guess wat guess wat....I GOT TO KNOW LEEEEEZ GOT A GIRLFRIEND! Ahahaha.

Hmmph! But hes not telling me whooo. Poodahh, ini kah kawan? Lermak bercream! Talking abt friends, its been such a long time ever since the last day of me lepaking with outside&old friends. Oh great, i should meeet them upp sooon. Haiishhh. Rindu yknow! :(

Anyhoo, after all god-knows-how-many fights we been thru, i cant explain why am i still holding to him. Both of us just tend to say sorry in the end bcuz we dont want to be separated. AWWW, sweeet kan, but nobody knows how tough it is to actually let go of someone we truly cherish. Maybe it is fact, our love is true. Oh maybe, it is just another experiment to test how far i can go. Or maybe it is just time. Lets see how far we come.

Thus, let me say it out loud again and again....

I STILL IN LOVE WITH AMIRULLAH!

And i hope he does too after all those lies i have overcome.

I know its hard to be faithful at times, i know but pls, think of it. Everything will come to good terms eventually. Before regretting, just stop and stare and ask urself what truly matters.

& jyeah, im sorry if i over react sometimes, girls can be a lil bit demanding but thats bcuz they want to feel the love, to have ur attention and nothing else.

Okkkayyy....i should proceed to my uncompleted amaths and maths homework. Oh goshh, chem chem chem! Take care! :D

Quote of the day: "Cause if I got you, I don't need money, I don't need cars, you're my all"

I swear, up to clouds nine that my dad is the sweeeetestt thing ever. SobSob. I LOVE you dad. He understand me better than anyone else does. He knows what i need in this current situation. Knowing that im in such a sour moood the whole of yesterday and stayed up till 4am in the morning, today dad actually bought me B&J again cuz he knows this particular ice cream could put a smile and light up my whole face again. I swear, i swear, i swear i feeel like crying now cuz i know deep down inside i cant repay my daddy's good deeds.. Oh please, tuhanku yang maha adil penyayang dan yang maha mendengar, panjangkan la umur ayahku. I cant imagine living my life without him.. I will be a lonely soul by then.

Dad: Here, B&J for you. Now no more sour moood k, very boring yknow kat rumah ni. Now, I want air teh (wide smile)

Me: Orite! Air teh coming right up boss! *hype tone with extra extra wide smile*

I love my dad. My dad is adorable. Adorable is my dad. Dad is my love. Ceyyybah!

Okay, im off to do english assignment in lappy. Waaaduuuh!

P.s - I dont know what i have become. Deep down inside, i know something is not right and that something is lost. Im searching for answers...

Quote of the day: "Well, all I need is the air i breathe and a place to rest my head"

How does it end up like this?

Bad newss, sungguh sekali. I was overdose with panadols on 27/06/08. Uh, dont ask me y. I couldnt express it here cuz it will literally be another long and yet boring post. But this is how i would like to express it :

"Life doesn't hurt until you think about,
how much things have changed,
who you've lost along the way,
and how much of it was your fault"

Anyhoo, as you all know blooddyy schooool start this week and as always timetable is being suuuchh an arse-hole! I cant comment much cuz the moment sch reopens theres examsss and testt every day. Mcm fcuk gituk kan! Wellll, that is blooodyy chua chu kang sec, like duh =_=
First day already late and yet got caught for attire. Same goes to the days afterrr...
Oh jyeah, another berita buruk, i need to start exercising again. And get back to dancing. HAH!

Leeeeezz is being succha an irritating idiotic. Mentang mentang ite tgh hoollls, hes trying to make me jealous. But wtf, i dont give a damn! (CEY BAHASA KASAR SIOL) PEACE! :DD

Will update if i have the time. Take care sweeeets! :D

Quote of the day: "Because i’m not the kind of girl to just give up like that"

I know my previous post indicate that im on hiatus but my hands just cant resist from blogging. Furthermore, I got something to say out loud cuz it hurts so much keeping it inside but for now, lets do it thru songs. And unfortunetely 4am in the morning says it all. Cool or wat? :DD

4am in the morning
Waking up to find another day
The moon got lost again last night
But now the sun has finally had its say
I guess I feel alright

But it hurts when I think
When I let it sink in
It’s all over me
I’m lying here in the dark
I’m watching you sleep, it hurts a lot
& all I know is
You’ve got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

[chorus]
I give you everything that I am
I’m handin’ over everything that I’ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don’t ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we’re gonna do it, come on do it right

All I wanted was to know I’m safe
Don’t want to lose the love I’ve found
Remember when you said that you would change
Don’t let me down
It’s not fair how you are
I can’t be complete, can you give me more?
& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

[chorus]
I give you everything that I am
I’m handin’ over everything that I’ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don’t ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we’re gonna do it, come on do it right

Oh please, you know what I need
Save all your love up for me
We can’t escape the love
Give me everything that you have

& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

[chorus]
I give you everything that I am
I’m handin’ over everything that I’ve got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don’t ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we’re gonna do it, come on do it right
---------------------------------------------

(klau blh nk besarkan everyword)
Boy, we all know its not fair. I give you my everything, and then you return it with? You got to give me your everything(Whoa, tamak sak fadz. Kakakaka!). But well for your info, whenever it comes to you i feel so insecure. If you are in my shoes, you will feel the pain and the worryness. You disappointed me, really and you know it damn well that my heart was crushed to bits and pieces again. It still hurts. Its not easy for me to forget everything that even a cut would not heal that fast. It takes time. This is not the first time, so just like before im gonna be alright or at least pretend to be alright. All we know is falling and why do we love to hurt so much? Alright drop the topic. The only thing you can do now is to make me feel secure, convince me that im the only girl that blows ur mind, i am the girl who you cant see leaving your life etc etc...but still, i know my love for you is stronger cuz i give you my all & you have my everything.
Theres more to say but lets end it here. Till here then, take care earthlings! :D

your heart is like a moving mountain

Sorry for not updating my blog. Ive been busy. Not with schools or homeworks but with friends. I went out many of times and actually went home pretty late on almost every outing.

Ahhhh-sommme? Narh...i got scolded with mom bcuz she lost trust on me. She thought im a typical kind of girl who would go out to have sex or something. COOL OR WAT? kthxbai! Thank you for thinking that negative of me. How could you, tuduh anak sendiri ini dan itu? And jyeah, thanx dad for defending me and still trusting me. Thank you!

Well, schs are abt to open sooo sooon and yet, everything here in my family are about to change. I meant, we are about to owe a new car and a new mini lappy is about to come soo sooon! COOL OR WAT? *jumps for 2otimes* :DDD

But other than that, theres is actually bad news. Theres physic exam this 23june, Amths exam this 25june and english ppr 2 exam this 27june. And wats worst, im just came to the conclusion that i must study. MUG MUG MUG for last minute! ( macam fadz jugak )

And hereby i came to a conclusion that i should put my blog and friendster under

- H - I - A - T -U - S ! ! ! -

Till here then, take care earthlings! :DDD

Quote of the day: "I love the way it feels when you are telling me that i'm the only one who blows your mind"

say it again

Marie digby - say it again

Thing about love, is I never saw it coming
You kinda crept up into me by surprise
And now there's a voice inside my heart that's got me wondering
Is this true? I wanna hear it one more time

[chorus]
Move in a little closer
Take it to a whisper
Get just a litter louder
Say it again for me
Cause I love the way it feels when you are telling me that i'm the only one who blows your mind
Say it again for me
It's like the whole world starts to listen when you tell me you're in love
Say it again

The thing about you is you know just how to get me
You talk about us like there's no end in sight
The thing about me is that I really wanna let you open the door and walk into my life

[chorus]

And it feels like it's the first time
That anybody's ever brought the sun without the rain
And never in my whole life
Have I heard words as beautiful as when you say my name

[chorus]

Cuz Im lost without you

Today was suppose to meet mamat, ain and sedara at bugis and then to marina to meet the rest but turned out to be a disaster. So we met at bishan instead and then to causeway to eat and meet up with kakak fazura. I was not in the mood to go out but wanted to go out, dont ask me why cuz IDKY. HAHAHA! However, i had fun la, after days & weeks of not contacting, we finally get to meet. YIPEE! We slack arnd woodlands. Then mamat got a called from his parents that his aunt was warded, like so sudden la seyh. Abeh terus all of us got no mood. So we had to call off the meet to next week i guess, with the rest this time. Well, I hope so. Then mamat dropped me off at marsiling mrt and off he go to Tan Tock Seng Hosp. And i got home by 10+ pm.

Funney thang just happened... Adik wanted to skip cuz he JUST realised hes getting fatter. So jyeah, he did maDe an attempted to skip until my older brother tease him these -

Shafie: OI DAYAT! JGN LOMPAT-LOMPAT LAAH! KAU KALAU LOMPAT RUMAH BOLEH ROBOH LA SEYH!
Me: (laugh my ass off) TAHHH...NNT RUMAH ROBOH MENYUSAHKAN MAK DAN AYAH TAW! DAHH DAHH STOP!
Dayat: SIAKK ARR, KORANG TAK BAIK SEYH. NI NAME KAKAK DAN ABG. HAISHH...! (stop skipping and put the rope away)
Me: LERRRHH, ABEH MAJOK. TAK HANSSEMMM! (laugh laugh laugh)

Okay, i know me and brother are being evil but trust me, my lil brother are much more evil thenn us. So jyeah, till here then. Tc! Have a great day loves!

Quote of the day: "When theres love, theres always pain"

Sweet symphony

-YG PALING SUPPORTING DAN YG PALING IRRITATING-

Arsehole brother. Irritating nak mampos! Like seriously, MENYAMPAH OI! Okay enough. Thats the case, he would love to disturb me if he could (tak kira masa dan tempat). Even yesterday i was at causeway point with nana, he called me and ask "Eh, kat maner? Boleh beli kan makanan tak? (padahal kat rumah ada spagetti siol)... Then at night, he would come into my room and irritate the one im talking with. Like yesterday i was talking to azrul (AHAHAHA. Inside joke) and he commented that im a "playgirl". Like *insert vulgarities here*! HMMPH!

Mulut nk kena super glue at times right?

SO jyeah, me and nana headed causeway to eat and slack(macam biasa la ey, the two gundus who loves to go out klau bored dan lapar. Kakaka!). And since both of us sama-sama rabun, we went all around the banquet to look at the menus... Then, someone pwee-weet, like duh, IRRITATING so i turn uh, skali org nye turned out to be khairul dini farhan bin azman! So me and nana approached him and salam his parents then talk for awhile. And eventually, we bought some food and sit and eat.

Soon after, we stroll around causeway and bought ice blended and search for new phones. Then lepak kat belakang causeway to wait for my friend abis keje so that me and nana can get some freeee foooddd. Hehehe! Then slackslack, and went home. Penat yet enjoyable.

Best thang of the day: "I love you. Not maybe, not tomorrow, not someday. Right now, at this very moment, I've realized something. I need you, I trust you, I admire you. I want you. And you can be wrong most of the time, and we can fight and be mad at each other, but nothing, nothing in this world... can change the fact that I love you".

B-O-R-E-D

Okay great. Im becoming more like a couch potato sitting and rotting at home. Bleh, sumpah boring giler babi! B-O-R-E-D screams for bored!! Mamat wanted to meet me but it was sooo late. He msged me and said "Fadz, i meet you at 11p.m, then go lepak2. Ill come and pick you up k?". Macam faham uh ni bdk, i told you i cant go out at night unless it's near my blok you want to lepak at, ni tak, kat woodlands. Giler pah boy? Alamak! Watever it is, theres ppl who didnt allow me to...like duh, my mom and *insert name here*. Ahahaha. So yeah, shall i reserve tis time to spent time with my baby, kan lappy. Syg lappy! Ahaha! Woooo! Im so egg-cited! Pfft! Being a queen of sarcasm is not helping, bloody hell. Boring! :(

Nevermind, since my hands are super ringan and active. Bagus, dah tak baa alip baa yer ey! Shall i upload chalet's pictures today? Okay, silence means yesh! Ok go! ahahak *lerr lame*

Dont ask me abt pictures for the cutting birthday cake session bcoz im not the one who took the pichas. Instead, im laughing my ass off with dearest cousin inside chalet watching showdown. Ahahaha. Movie mania same sedara mara cramp inside one small chalet mcm hell, SEMPUT I TELL YOU. But it was F-U-N! JYEAH! :DD

And now, my adik bawak rombongan kwn-kwn nya ke rumah utk bersembang. And me mcm bdk bodoh duduk diam2 dgn muker ter-slenger bacinnye. AHAHA! Okay, tu BEDEK cuz i know them since they were in primary sch. And two of them came just to shit in the toilet..like *insert vulgarities here* Nvmind, and mak says shitting on ones toilet means you leaving rezeki. HAH, REZEKI MY ASS.

Quote of the day: "I would love to sit on a cloud, and watch the world go by. Leaving all of my worries behind"

Cuz you will always be my baby

Okay, scratch the previous post...Like whooaaa....fucking EMO siol! AHAHAHAK. Bottomline is I LOVE HIM VERY VERY MUCH. Okay? A-Z kan? Line clear? Ok bomb! *laa..merepek*

I had dinner with nana today. Dier gaduh lagy sama matair oi...dah tkleh kira uh brape kaly dorang gaduh, like seriously. INSAF LA WAHAI INSAN. Then, went sakinah's cribs to watch movie together2.. Heee :D Okay dah, mlas nk cerita.

And jyeah, i fucking lazy to upload chalet pictures. AHAHAK. Baa alip baa yer btol! Okay bye. Tc loves!

Quote of the day: "I miss you more then you know"

Im Sorry yet again

IM SORRY :(

I can’t believe this happened, i made him sad bcoz of what i said which me myself dont know whether its true or not. You dont understand. Maybe its me and not you, idk. If only both of us could see what’s inside the heart, then there’d be no more doubts. I don’t want to sensationalize what’s happening but, its making me sad too. The last thing i wanna do is hurt the one i love. I sound pathetic, but that’s the truth bcuz my heart was broken since the day i know everything *insert emotion here*. He is my most favorite person right now, and he is special to me. I hope he knows that.

I told him "I wish he miss me the way i miss him" and he said, "yes, i miss you truck lots inside the heart". Honestly boy, i was touched, thank you. You made me feel better after days of torture of not being able to have hours of sleeping late night calls with you. Telling me you love me every night bcuz thats the night that keep us alive. But boy, tell me why am i hearing voices that tells me u're lying? Why am i thinking that you love someone else instead of me? Why am i always planning to leave you and sacrifice my heart for them though i love you pretty very much? Why am i always thinking of them and not me? Why am i always making you feel so bad? Why am i hurting you so much? Why am i such a sinister? Oh boy.

I say, im over reacting. Adik said, whoa you really-really love him. Cuzin said, its complicated. Leez said, its depends on both you. Ayim and sakinah said, trust him maybe he really do love you. Ain said, tepuk dada tanyer hati sendiri. Jess said, girls are weak when it comes to love, be strong girl. Gah, i hate myself for always hurting you. I hate this part, the voices that betray me. After 6months of knowing you, is this how i treat you? Do i sound sad enuf? Oh, better be bcoz i feelll so bad. I hate this bullshit thoughts. Oh god, please throw these junk away cuz i hurt him pretty a lot. Go hurt me now, its ur turn. Do it cuz i think i deserve it. Oh please someone hug me and tell me that everything's gonna be okay cuz heaven knows i tried. Cant i make you feel better? Am i only good at making you sad? Oh please take me away, i hate this.

Happy birthday to daddy!
Pictures will be uploaded soon.

Quote of the day: "You will always be a part of me and im part of you indefinitely. You know you cant escape me, cuz you will always be my baby" - david cook

-Muker tkleh carry uh. Macam tgh flirt nk masok bilik maksiat-

Haish. Today marked the day im going to downtown to celebrate DADDY'S BIRTHDAY! BIG BIG BIG EVENT FOR ME! Bcuz i LOVE DADDY MORE THAN MY LIFE, i swear. 06/06/1963 is the day MY BEST PERSON IN THIS WORLD WERE BORN. Yipee yipee yipee! Daddy have done a lot for me and i really appreciate it. I wish i could pay back his good deeds though i have and i tried, but i still feel that i have not done anything, like seriously :(

I know i have done succha big mess in this well bonded family, and i know i have disappointed all of you. I crushed all your hopes to pieces and i betrayed your trust you had for me. I know, i know. Im speechless here bcuz its all because of me..i guess it will be much more better if i were not born. That I wouldnt create such a mess and disguise for this family. HAISH. "Tak guna menyesal di kemudian hari kerana ia sudah terlambat". Time is running out, and i gonna make something fruitful that will actually made my parents proud. I MUST! *No more insyallah, i must forced myself. Pls fadz!* :DD

HAPPY ADVANCE BIRTHDAY DADDY! SYG DADDY MANY2!

SEMOGA DIPANJANGKAN UMUR DAN DIKURNIAKAN REZEKI !

AMIN! :DD

And not to forget, I WILL MISS BBYBOY SO MUCH. ARGH, BIGTIME LA SEYH! Yknow i cant have any late night calls with you for 2days+ since im in downtown. And im not sure if you're gonna text me bcuz i rarely get any replies from you nowadays. Sometimes, i wonder if you ever miss me the way i miss you. Sometimes, i wish you would get mad for not contacting you. Sometimes i wish you are the person who will find me like how a poor person greeds for food. But, its okay. Im not expecting for any cuz im not desperate. So jyeah, take care bby beloku! ILY! :)

Quote of the day: "Stay with me, this is what i need. Please. Bcuz this heart beats for only you" - paramore

I know i being self-centered here but i have to let it out. Im sorry for showing you attitude again yesterday. I should have understand you better. That you're tired and wanted to sleep early just cuz you have an early meet the next morning. WHOA, but how the fucking hell i know bowdow. I guess you are busy, real busy. I shouldnt be talking abt him in this blog bcuz he will obviously read it. Sorry ey, i have to express it. Aku org klau tak puas haty aku sound..cuz im tired of keeping it inside. Watever it is, it doesnt matter anymore bcoz i always see this as my fault for not being understanding. So, Im sorry.

Ainn sweetheart have the same prob too, what a small world :DD

This is what she said in her blog -

"Hmmkay, can you please spare a little thoughts for me? Can you do it boy/man? I've been putting all my effort onto you! Bahhhhh! =/ I think you should sit back, and think what i've done for you. You can't compare me with other girls, mind you. Stop all those shit(s) before my patience gone to the limit. I've been thinking of you day and night boy. I miss you so much, like no one ever miss you. Keep this in your mind, I miss you so so much boy. It is so simple to udstd it boy, just like an abc".

Im going out with class today to some literature course. Take care loves! :DD

Quote of the day: "It is as simple as an ABC boy, but its ok i understand"

I MISS BBYBOY SO MUCH! SERIOUSLY,

VERY MUCH! :DD

Quote of the day: "If i could give you one thing in life, i would give you the ability to see yourself through my eyes, only then you will realise how special you really are to me".